Murderswans.

Look Mummy! Swans!

Ahhh, look at the pretty swans. There's mummy swan with all her cute fluffy ickle baby swans.

Isn't she beautiful William?

 And over there, that's daddy swan. Look how handsome he is.

 What is he doing Mummy?

Well, he's er..

I mean, he must be, that is, he's, um...

Do you know, I'm not sure William. Nigel, what do you think?

Oh dear, I say Nigel, is that swan doing what I think it's doing?

Oh my God! He is! He's brutally murdering that gosling to death!

Don't look William! Nigel! For Christ's sake cover his eyes! Don't let him see!

Make it stop Mummy! Make it stop! Why won't it stop? It's already dead!

Please make it stop! Mummy! I want to go home!

That's the last time I listen to you, Nigel. "Let's go for a walk in the countryside", "Let's get some fresh air", "It will be good for William to be out of the house". Now look at him! This sort of thing doesn't happen on Springwatch...